the moon*

“Yours is the light by which my spirit's born: - you are my sun, my moon, and all my stars.” 

{E.E. Cummings}

Tonight we stared up at a full honey moon, large, hanging heavy in the midnight blue sky. Its soft, cold light reflecting on the ink ocean, wavering, almost dipping into its dark waters. A distant beauty, yet for just a moment almost within reach. I stretch out my hand... and feel you right there next to me. Once again I am in awe of you and your unconditional love. You will never leave me nor forsake me. You are constant, your love secure. I do not deserve it.... I fail you (I am sorry) and yet you love me still, for that I am eternally (indescribably) humbled. You are my treasure, you are precious to me, your worth is beyond measure and I promise to spend the rest of my life trying to show just how much you mean to me... I love you. Thank-you will never be enough.

home is where the heart is

"Though the fire of the heart may have withered its core 

Unto ashes and dust--though the head have turned hoar 

Ere its time, as the surfs o'er the breakers that foam 

Still, a tear will arise when we think upon Home."

{Albert Pike}

It has been a week since you have gone. Standing in the darkened doorway, starts far above, coldly shining down on us, hushed and mocking, tears falling without ceasing, body shaking, soul tearing. Breaking as you said goodbye with one last kiss, one last embrace, one last promise. 

Closing the door, watching your shadow disappear through the glass, blurred with unspoken fears and overflowing sorrow. 

Every where I look I am reminded of you. Always in my thoughts, always in my heart. The days have been long and empty. Peace out of reach, happiness beyond my grasp. No purpose. No joy. I am restless without you. Lost and alone, left longing after every one else has forgotten. They do not know and they do not care. Trapped in their own worlds and ignorant of mine. 

But here I am standing, arms wide open, waiting for you to come home. Soon.