Things I love about Raynard

(Just a few... or else you would be here forever!!)

1. His smile :)
2. The way he laughs.
3. How he sings in church, but doesn't pay attention and gets the lyrics wrong.
4. How he plays with the engagement ring on my finger.
5. His crushing hugs.
6. How he loves to read. And all the incredible authors he devours. Challenging and encouraging me. 
7. When he excitedly tells me of all that he is learning about in class and laughs when I get it all wrong. Or attempt to argue with him, just because. 
8. He makes the best chocolate chunk cookies. Actually he is a wonderful baker. (I am a little bit jealous!)
9. How he is "crunchy" reformed. But together we struggle through the questions and hot topics. We are growing!
10. He makes the ordinary, every day, magical.
11. His generosity, honesty and utter faithfulness.
12. He is truly selfless. 
13. The way he teases my sisters, bakes with them, talk to my mom, discusses theology with my dad, walks our dog, and how my family adores him. (Perfect!)
14. How he was the only one that would teach me to drive - and whenever I drive his car he tries so hard to not freak out and just prays like crazy. Still can't believe he gave me a set of my own keys for "our" car!
15. He spoils me with little treats all the time and lets me know that he is constantly thinking of me. He never stops saying "I love you" (and I never get tried of hearing it!)
16. He is open to adventures and is happy to try out new things with me.
17. He makes me breakfast and lunch every single day for varsity, before the sun has risen, and walks me to the train station - for almost two years now!!
18. He is still trying to teach me how to Sokkie.
19. He never complains. And reminds me to be thankful for all the rich blessings and provisions that God has given to us.
20. The way he holds me while we dance around the kitchen.
21. The way he is always calm and keeps my feet on level ground.
22. He loves the beach but hates the sand - like me.
23. He never seems to be afraid. Even when I am terrified. (He also kills spiders and creepy bugs for me without blinking an eye).
24. His perspective - helping me to refocus on what truly matters, what really lasts, what stretches into eternity and to live in that light.
25. His passion for the gospel and mission.
26. His love for apologetics.
27. He gives me the last piece of chocolate, scoop of ice-cream, sip of his hot chocolate. He shares when I am tempted to be greedy and keep it all for myself. 
28. Holding me accountable.
29. He does everything for God's glory.
30. He cooks, he cleans, he gardens, he does laundry, he is able to fix almost anything, it's every girl's dream!
31. The way he can fall asleep just like that. And almost every time we watch a movie.
32. Related: what his hair looks like when he wake up - it's adorable :)
33. His gentle care, knowing what I need when I don't even realize it, always making me feel better.
34. He makes the best toasted cheese sandwiches. And tea!
35. He is slow to get angry and quick to forgive.
36. His love is overwhelming, gracious, undeserved.
37. He loves food just as much as I do :D
38. He has turned me into a coffee addict.
39. How he is trying to convert me to love his favourite sports - cycling, cricket, rugby - but doesn't mind if I just don't get it, or would rather read a book.
40. His talent in taking the most spectacular, insightful photographs that tell a story
41. He put me first, thinks of my best interests constantly, always has a plan, provides for me, makes provision for the future, works so incredibly hard to make it all possible.
42. He makes me feel beautiful, especially when I feel anything but.
43. We dream together. Who could think of anything more amazing than being able to spend the rest of your life with your best friend?!
44. He makes me feel safe.
45. His prayers.
46. Whenever I get angry he just smiles and starts laughing, making me more angry, until I realise how ridiculous I am being and start laughing too :)
47. His sense of humour.
48. His perseverance. He never gives up on me. 
49. His support and strength. 
50. I never realised it would be like this - fully vulnerable before someone, yet fully trusted and accepted by them, loved unconditionally by them, despite your faults. It is wondrous! He has showed me what real love is. Like the love God has shown us in His Son Jesus. 

Happy Anniversary Raynard! Here is to forever.

Forever thankful

(Last night at Bible study: my praise prayer point)

Raynard. Especially. For too many reasons to count. 

He is not afraid to rebuke me, to tell me that I am being immature and selfish. He hold me accountable. He humbles me. He makes me take my eyes off of myself and focus them back onto Jesus. Perspective. He helps me when I get so caught up in my work, showing me that I'm wrong, that it's not all about me, me, me. He will force me to go to Bible study when I don't feel like it because he understands, he truly knows what I need, what is best for me, and I will forever be thankful for that.

He has been so loving, so selfless, so sacrificial, so supportive, so tender, so kind, so strong, so patient, so gracious, but firm when I need to hear what I don't want to hear it, these past (almost unbearably difficult) weeks. With him by my side I am growing (and growing up), encouraged, reminded constantly, to glorify God every moment, to proclaim the Gospel, to be praying for us and our friends and to live in the light of eternity - what all of life is really about!

Thank-you Ray, really, really, REALLY (words are not enough, and never will be, so I will  just never stop saying "THANK-YOU!") I love you. 

X

To my Person: I am a complete person, but with you I am whole

To my Person.

A year. Has passed in the twinkling of an eye, a stolen kiss, a quick smile. Paradoxically it seems as though I have known you forever.

I look back...surprised! Overjoyed! Unbelieving at what this past year has brought. In the untamed fantasies of my infinite imagination I could never have dreamt this wonder for myself.

The pain and hurt it took to get where we are now has been worth every sleepless night and fallen tear. God brought us together – despite my greatest fears and doubts, my hesitancy and bitterness. My heart was broken, but you picked up the pieces and put me back together – more beautiful than before.

I am a complete person, but with you I am whole.

You are not just my boyfriend...you are my BEST friend! (How perfect is that?!)

You are what I would have wished for myself if I had known what to wish for. I am eternally grateful, forever thankful for you and you’re all consuming, passionate, safe and secure love.

It is the little things – which are actually the big things! Waking up before the sun has risen, making me breakfast and lunch, walking me beneath the stars to the train station – each and every single morning! (I want to watch every sunrise with you by my side) The quiet, thoughtful texts and messages. Scrawled love letters, unexpected gifts. Waiting on the platform with a chocolate in your hand. Walking the dog together in the summer sunshine. Supper every evening with the family. Napping on the couch. Making my tea just the way I like it. Watching series – while you fall asleep. Baking the most delicious chocolate chip cookies. Telling me that I am beautiful when I am in my pjs and wearing no makeup. Holding hands as we pray late at night. Those ‘non-special’ things of living life every day that are the most special! You’re kindness, generousity, patience, forgiveness, humour, encouragement, godliness, holding me accountable – keeping God at the centre – wow, I feel so blessed to have you! The hugs, the kisses, the tear wiping, the laughing... You make me want to be the best person I can be – you have changed me, in the most phenomenal way. You are my strength, my support. I would not have survived this year without you.

Every day is another day spent with you, until there are no days left.  Spending my life with you is beyond incredible, beyond wonderful, beyond amazing...*

Only one thing left to say: I love you.

a text

*beep beep*

It reads, 

"Thank you. 

Thank you for being the one I have always wanted, but the one I actually always needed. Thank-you for being the one I liked, but actually always the one I loved. Thank-you for being you, when it is you that I love and not the woman the world says I should love. Thank-you for taking my breath and keeping it. Thank-you for stealing my heart but actually keeping it safe and alive in a better place. Thank-you for 1 year, that could only be better if doubled. I love you and cannot wait to double, to extend my all with you.

I love you.

A lot."

(He is amazing)